As a young girl, I remember being a cheerleader in elementary school for a Bethesda Athletic Club League in Durham, in middle school for Chewning Middle School, and in high school taking cheer training at the Museum of Life and Science. I loved being a cheerleader because I could wear cute uniforms, cheer loud for my school and do fun cheers, stunts and jumps. Essentially, the cheerleaders served as the motivators for the team as they worked to win the game. And guess what the best part about being a cheerleader was? It was when we were told that we actually apart of the team. The football and basketball coaches told us that we were not merely girls jumping and screaming for victory, but we were often the motivation and "push" that made the victory possible.
In marriage, you and your spouse are on ONE team. Therefore, it's essential to make sure you're on the team wholeheartedly and you are giving 100% effort to gain the victory. You have to make sure you are on one accord by being on the same page. This means that you must have a game plan and you each must KNOW what the game plan entails. If one of you knows the game plan and the other is confused about where you are headed or what you are doing as a family, you will breed an atmosphere of confusion and chaos. In the NBA, if any team gathers together to go over the plays and one team member is confused, it will show up on the court. Likewise, if the coach discusses a game plan before going onto the court and the team is totally confused about each of their positions, the game will be a disaster for that team and will result in a loss for them. Furthermore, each team member must be supportive of the other and eliminate all envy and jealousy for the betterment of the team. If you have team members who are competing against each other instead of working together, it will result in a loss for the team.
I have learned that marriage is the same exact way. We are a team and therefore we must each know the game plan in order to have success in our marriage. Likewise, we must support each other. It's not a competition between my husband and I because when he wins, so do I! And when I win, so does he! We're ONE so it doesn't matter who shoots the game winning buzzer shot. As long as the ball goes in, we both WIN!
God tells us in his Word, in Amos 3:3, "Can two walk together, unless they have agreed?" This verse means that there is no way two people can walk together as one unit unless they agree on where they are going and in what direction they are going. It's essential to have oneness and agreement. Next, the Bible tells us, in 1 Thessalonians 5:11 ~ "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up..."This is ESSENTIAL in marriage because support is the driving force that makes you want to be a better you.
Now let me be very clear. Your aim should never be to change your spouse, because you should marry them with the thought in mind that they may never change. I often tell people to ask themselves, "If he or she never changed from how they are right now, could I be content with who they are?" If the answer is no, then you aren't ready to marry that person. If the answer is yes, you must truly embrace that and realize that you must be comfortable with who they are. Now....being comfortable with them does not mean never pushing them to be their best. There have been so many nights when I've felt like giving up and throwing in the towel on various tasks and assignments in life. However, I pray and feel the presence of the Lord telling me to keep pushing forward. In addition, my husband echoes the voice of the Lord when he tells me not to quit and to stay focused on the goal ahead. It's a beautiful thing and an encouraging feeling to know that he supports me and believes in me.
In the same way, my husband faces moments of frustration and has days where he's discouraged and disheartened. However, I aim to stay conscious about being super supportive of his goals and dreams, and pushing him to never give up. When he gets lazy on a particular task, I ask him multiple times in a week about his progress on the task to keep him motivated. In addition, I ensure that I am not being "nagging," and instead being "nurturing" in my tone. If he has a weight loss goal, I don't throw it in his face when he's eating cookies at night. However, if we're out at the mall together and he's debating on a fruit smoothie or a Dairy Queen Blizzard, I quickly tell him that I think the fruit smoothie may be better for his health. It's all in the tone of love and nourishment which comforts him and makes him feel supported in his goals. Furthermore, my response of support shows that I know our game plan concerning our health and fitness and I have wholeheartedly latched on to the plan.
When you are latched together, you stay connected and allow nothing to come between you. The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 4:12 ~ ...."Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A three strand cord is not easily broken."When you stay connected with your spouse and the game plan that GOD has given you for your lives, you grasp the importance of latching on to your spouse. God created you as ONE and therefore desires for you to bring him glory as ONE. You can only do so in agreement. Therefore, it's essential to make sure you both understand the game plan, embrace it, follow it together, and become the best that you each can be with the other by your side...constantly cheering, supporting and giving you the fist bump of motivation that you need.
Nuggets to remember:
1) Your spouse is not your competition. You are a TEAM.
2) In order to win the game, you must know the game plan and be ALL in.
3) The key to success is supporting your spouse, not envying or showing jealousy towards one another.
4) God made you ONE unit when you became ONE in HIM. Stay latched on to one another and don't stop encouraging each other to be the best you can be.
God Bless!
~ CW
No comments:
Post a Comment